I just finished reading and reviewing the book From Pain to Peace by Pat Bluth. Pat is a local author who I went and listened to her speak last week in Nisswa. I had went to school with her daughter who was killed by a drunk driver in 1985 and wanted to hear Pat’s faith story.
While reviewing the book I found scripture that spoke to me in such a way, it caused me pause. I actually stopped reading and read again the scripture. And then again. And then, again.
The scripture I am referring to is from Psalm 139:
1 O Lord, you have examined my heart
and know everything about me.
2 You know when I sit down or stand up.
You know my thoughts even when I’m far away.
3 You see me when I travel
and when I rest at home.
You know everything I do.
4 You know what I am going to say
even before I say it, Lord.
5 You go before me and follow me.
You place your hand of blessing on my head.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too great for me to understand! 7 I can never escape from your Spirit!
I can never get away from your presence!
8 If I go up to heaven, you are there;
if I go down to the grave,[a] you are there.
As I read Pat’s book and her time of great grief, I hit upon my times of grief as well. Reading the above scripture reminded me that even at my lowest low, God was there. He is always there. I don’t know why that hit me so profoundly but for some reason it was one of those crazy “aha” moments.
I am sure that each of at different times in our life can look at our situation and forget that God is there. God is there. At times we need to really just stop and rest in that knowledge and let Him do His work in us. There is such comfort in that.
Today – think about where you are and what is going on in your life. God is there. Look at the God piece in your life. Look at the God peace in your life.
So – brief update on where I am coming to the end of day three…. yesterday I hit the bike trail behind Movies 10 and biked to Merrifeld and back – using this quiet time to be my prayer time for Al. So what can you cover in 18 miles? As it turns out – a lot!
- Prayer for patience (for me)
- peace and rest for Al as he works so hard at our business
- prayer for God to open my eyes to ways I can support Al better
- prayer for our business
- prayer for more time together
- prayer for a gentle spirit – (me again)
- prayer for doors to open
- prayer for my eyes to open to the big picture
- prayer for “SHMILY” opportunities
It is possible to pray for 18 miles. The ride was peaceful and I just gave it all to God.
I made one of his favorite dinners…. meatloaf (heart shaped) and garlic potaoes with peas. I also made a carrot cake with cream cheese frosting with SHMILY written on in.
This morning I started my day with prayers for AL and his day… I read again in our book, prayed my way through my morning prep and throughout the day as I was able. Tonight, I am still waiting for him to get home, but worked with him in the office this late afternoon and shared the weight that the business can often carry.
You think you own whatever land you land on
The Earth is just a dead thing you can claim
But I know every rock and tree and creature
Has a life, has a spirit, has a name
You think the only people who are people
Are the people who look and think like you
But if you walk the footsteps of a stranger
You’ll learn things you never knew you never knew
Have you ever heard the wolf cry to the blue corn moon
Or asked the grinning bobcat why he grinned?
Can you sing with all the voices of the mountains?
Can you paint with all the colors of the wind?
Can you paint with all the colors of the wind?
Come run the hidden pine trails of the forest
Come taste the sunsweet berries of the Earth
Come roll in all the riches all around you
And for once, never wonder what they’re worth
The rainstorm and the river are my brothers
The heron and the otter are my friends
And we are all connected to each other
In a circle, in a hoop that never ends
How high will the sycamore grow?
If you cut it down, then you’ll never know
And you’ll never hear the wolf cry to the blue corn moon
For whether we are white or copper skinned
We need to sing with all the voices of the mountains
We need to paint with all the colors of the wind
You can own the Earth and still
All you’ll own is Earth until
You can paint with all the colors of the wind
Paul Bunyan Trail, Baxter Mn, May 2009
- Another amazing week of events and “to do’s”
- Weigh in was good – another 2 pounds gone (PTL!) for a new total of 23! (A little nervous about this weeks weigh in… loved the ham and shrimp a bit too much on Christmas!)
- Wednesday, Christmas Eve, went to my cousin Cheryl’s for appetizers (yup – oh oh) and hanging with a bit of family for awhile. It was nice to see everyone.
- Thursday – Christmas day had the boys over and opened gifts. It was a great day! We watched Family Man (the movie with Nicholas Cage) and The Dark Knight on DVD… ate too much, but had a great day of just hanging out with each other.
- Friday Al and Justin took off for a snowmobile trip to our cabin up North. I had the weekend to myself and went to a movie, Marley and Me, with Karol Kruse. See review here.
- See below post for my weekend alone thoughts….
- I am reading a great book for book club called Sarah’s Key by Tatiana de Rosnay… incredible read… watch for the review here soon
- Saturday I stayed at home most of the day – a bit of housework but mostly just relaxing, reading, catching up on the R & R.
- Sunday, I picked Chance up and we went to church and then we went to the YMCA together and worked out. Back at the house we watched LOST episodes until Al and Justin got home and then Chance opened up his gift from us.
- Great week and now my big focus is on getting back on track from all the holiday stuff (I never did get my Christmas Cards out…). I am really looking forward to starting the boot camp yet this week! See Boot Camp post here
Ok… I have been thinking about this since August and just hadn’t found the right time to implement it – but now I feel I am ready.
Starting January 1, I am going to embark on a 31 day Spiritual Boot Camp. Here is what that means:
Mind: I am going to spend a minimum of 30 minutes reading my Bible 5 times a week. (This is a commitment I need to do because life tends to get in the way and I dont do this as often as I should or certainly could).
Body: I will work out a minimum of 4 times a week at least 30 minutes a time. I will continue to eat better.
Spirit: I will spend a minimum of 30 minutes in prayer 5 times a week. (This is something I should consistently be doing anyway).
At some point in January I will take a silent retreat to our cabin. I have never done this and am excited to do it!
I will blog through my month and the happenings. I am open to anyone who would care to join me in this Boot Camp. If you are interested, leave me a message here…. I would love the support and the company!
This past weekend I attended a wedding of my cousin. It was a beautiful wedding but I find family events hard. Memories float up and I feel a loss when I see all my aunts and uncles, cousins, and family all close. Any event my parents would have attended pulls at my heart.
I see how they casually laugh and poke fun at one another and I know from deep within me that they do not see what I see. Their togetherness works in my mind like snap shots… photos to be captured forever…..
One of my uncles dancing with my cousin… My aunt dancing with her newly married son… brothers and sisters poking fun at one another…
And I am thinking that they do not even know what they have….
I don’t always fit at these events. I make my appearance and make my exit at an appropriate (hopefully) time. I know they don’t understand why it pains me. I don’t expect them too.
Coming home and standing on my deck this evening, smelling the lilacs in the air and loving this time of year… I realize I am not sure I understand why I am this way either. My tears are not always of pain, but also of love – and fondness for my family and the blessings that they have in each other.
Sometimes I think it is a gift that I see things this way. Other times I think its a curse. I take a lot of pictures of people together, candid moments of them close to one another to capture forever. I never know when I may be taking the pictures that sticks with them forever.
I breathe in the lilacs… I love this time of year. And it makes me cry.
I have to admit… this was kind of cool. I think I want to argue to music from now on. There is something kind of poetic about it… Check it out here.
- Last Monday the Teen Challenge Silent Auction Team met for the first time as a group. It was so fun to meet all these wonderful people with the same goal in mind. We will meet now for the next 6 weeks on Mondays.
- Our Ladies night out event on Thursday was fun and we decorated 50 pots and then put plants in them in hopes of Spring! (Next month – Ladies BINGO…. yes, there is a difference)
- On Friday Al and I went to the movie 21. That was pretty good.
- Saturdays Food For Honduras Event was incredible! If you were there – you know. 130,000 meals were prepared to be shipped to Honduras.
- Saturday evening Al and I had an open house to attend and I learned how to “Race Minnows”. That was a blast!
- I completed two great fiction reads this past week. See reviews here.
I want to share with you a website I found called Swaptree. This website encourages trading when it comes to the books, cd’s, and DVD’s you no longer want.
It it easy to use…. simply go through your pile of already read books, DVD’s you really don’t watch and CD’s you really don’t listen too. You sign up on the website and by entering the ISBN or UPC number for the item, it will pots it on line and immediately show you lists of things you can receive in exchange. You pay only the shipping.
I just found this so I am testing it out now.
Today, check out this site and save a tree… and a landfill.
Happy Earth Day!